The Last Stand
by NewYear's Tragedy
Summary: Humanity's last stand has come and gone for those of the Survey Corps. With their goal now accomplished, Erwin Smith is now left to deal with the aftermath and face the demons lurking deep within his mind. Letting go may be the hardest endeavor he has ever strived for.


**The Last Stand**

Acknowledgements:  
><em>The Last Stand<em> is written for commander_kirschtein, who always reminded me that a love/hate relationship was a hell of a lot more interesting than a normal one.

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><p><span><strong>The Last Stand<strong>

_by NewYear's Tragedy_

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><p>Fifteen years ago if you had asked where he would be twenty years from now, he would of answered: serving up his time in hell. For someone such as he who willingly led thousands of troops to their deaths, the life he had been granted seemed all too perfect. Today, Erwin Smith was no longer a soldier in the Great War for Humanity. In fact, there wasn't much of a war to begin with. Ten years ago humanity reclaimed Wall Maria. Five years after that, humanity, for the first time in centuries, expanded beyond the wall and held their own pushing the Titans back. He could go on to tell of all the victorious battles and the devastating defeats but none of that mattered anymore where he was at. With copious amounts of time and growing stress he had aged quite a bit, no longer concerning himself in the affairs of the outside world. His young clean shaven face was no more. His jawline prickled with growing stubble he never bother to shave away. Those blue eyes he had were almost always at half-mast giving him the bored out of my mind look. He had even trimmed his fading blonde hair (the color he commonly referred to as dish water blonde) shorter because he no longer cared to keep maintenance up on it. Right now, he bid his ticking time anyway in a small house outside those walls in the far distance he always reached for when on expeditions.<p>

He wasn't alone by any means. Solitary life was never an option for him, so he did share his home with another. Erwin had long ago confessed his growing affection and love for his second in command who undoubtedly returned those feelings with just as much vigor. Not a second too late, he might add. Putting off information such as that only wasted more years they could have had together. In an occupation such as his where any day could be your last, holding back was stupidly foolish. Even he had been guilty of it and if not for a certain incident he may have never told Levi. He never regretted telling him to this day. They lived under the same roof since he first moved out here. Levi had stayed by his side even when he no longer needed to. He was no longer Erwin's corporal but rather an equal who mattered just as much as breathing in Erwin's eyes.

Erwin Smith often wondered what became of those members of the 104 Training Regiment. But he did well to quell those thoughts as soon as they arose. Not all of them lived to see life outside the walls and instead joined the many before them to die in the line of duty. He'd never forget reaching the ocean with the remaining members of the Survey Corps. They had eliminated maybe three titans in the fifty mile stretch before the trees thinned out revealing an endless blue for miles.

Arlert, (he had long forgotten the boy's first name), made it to the shores first, stopping only when he was knee deep in the surf before dropping to his knees and screaming. His trio of best friends never made it to see the beauty of the ocean with him. Out of his friends, one died in action and the other by the hand of humanity. All titan shifters were executed at the completion of the main decisive battle. They didn't fight it when the axe fell down towards their heads, for they too realized they were a part of what needed to disappear in order for the world start once more. Erwin hoped, for their sake, the end would justify the means.

Kirschtein, a young lanky boy from the 104, drove his swords deep into the sand before kneeling on the ground and crying into one of his hands. The others, whose names failed him, just stood there staring blankly out into the sea. Erwin himself vowed to stop fighting after that, dropping his maneuver gear into the sand and discarding his swords straight into the water. The weapons disappeared under the water's surface to become rusty in the months that would follow. Not even seconds after, a sword came sailing by his head followed by another. It didn't stop there, more swords soon rained down onto the water's moving surface joining his own. He'd glance back and notice his legion had once again shadowed him, even at that time when he was a rogue commander; they still followed and began discarding their own maneuver gear. Tears streaked down their faces and smiles of happiness despite the overwhelming sadness clung to them. There was no victory speech or declaration of what they'd accomplished that day. Making it to the ocean didn't change a thing like they thought it would. Their sanity was held in tact by one common goal and now that goal was gone. They could finally begin healing now if any part of them was still left as many of them had given that up too for humanity. So one question remained that would go unanswered for all of them: what now?

Erwin had sighed deeply through his nose and stepped over his fallen gear that consisted of his harness, cables, and blades. Next to his unused blades, a sparkling bolo tie was left to heat up in the sun and eventually be buried deep into the sand with the passing of time. He walked away from the surf with Levi in tow behind him, leaving behind only material items for they would never stop being soldiers.

He'd never fight for humanity again. And neither would all those with him that day. The Survey Corps, no longer needed, disbanded.

Years later, he had once tried to tell Levi his inner most thoughts on his time as a commander in the military. Opening up to describe the things he witnessed and even the things he did himself was always hard on him. To put yourself on display for someone else to analyze was unsettling. His own personal demons had never let him live it down and he was frequently visited by all those who had served then ultimately died under his command. Nightmares came often despite the number of years that he had distanced himself from that lifestyle. A medical practitioner described his symptoms as one who had Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that came with vivid flashbacks of his time in the service. They would stand at the foot of his bed some nights and other nights watch him as he was eating at the dinner table. He always imagined them talking how they would when they still lived.

But one particular soldier that haunted him the most was the one he saw on occasion who never said a word. His figure was blurry and distorted most of the time as far as Erwin could tell. If he looked too long at the soldier, it vanish. Whenever he awoke from a strong nightmare, Erwin always saw that soldier behind his eyelids before fading away. Even one day when he was fixing a loose board on roof of his home and promptly fell off when a series of events led up to it; he saw that distorted soldier watching him just before he fell. He was gone when Erwin landed in some bushes moments later. He often wondered if it was a man under his command that he sent to die haunting him, but that never felt like the correct answer. This soldier was more than that in a way Erwin could not put into words because it was something he felt inside him, not something he knew for a fact in his head. Seeing these 'hallucinations' never really bothered him, though. They only came at night in his dreams and only occurred in the day if he was having one of those off days where he felt like he was sinking. Seeing the people he once knew in real life was a relief at times because it proved that they were not forgotten, to him at least. But lately with no warning, the nightmares became more and more frequent.

On the seventh night of his thousand yard stare into nothingness, Levi suggested therapy. He in turn shot that idea down stating he was not in fact crazy just haunted by the shit he had endured. It happened again one night as he lay in his bed. He woke up screaming his arm reaching out to grab something but always coming up short. Memories of days lived and suffered would reel across his eyes before reality would bleed back into focus. Phantom pain would claw at his missing arm and he would clutch at his own heart, fearing it would jump right out of his chest on those nights. Hands always wrapped around him to pull him into a loving embrace to sooth his fragile soul that had gotten damaged along the way.

On the tenth night he awoke screaming, he relented and agreed to seek professional help to quell his unconscious mind. He saddled up his horse the next morning and was off to the nearest city. Therapy was just how he expected. The therapy was mainly invasive questions digging into his past life and occupation. At times he would be asked to talk about whatever came to mind. Those days he'd ramble on about day to day matters and every now and then mention his recurring dreams.

The day of his next session, he was surprised to see a lounge chair placed in his usual seat. A white tarp was draped over it hiding multiple objects. He had questioned his therapist what the items were and he was only told that the man believed he knew what was causing Erwin's nightmares. He asked Erwin to remove each section of the tarp and to hold the object that dwelled under it without looking. Once it was in his hand, the therapist would tell him to open his eyes. It seemed simple enough. He agreed with the arrangement, eager to rid himself of the sleepless nights.

Closing his eyes, he reached out to grab the first object. He knew it was metal by the touch and the outside was smooth that curved all the way around. The metal was about a foot and a half long with some sort of knob at one end. He heard the therapist tell him to look. Erwin blinked and opened his eyelids. In his hand was a long, slender gas canister they had used in the functioning of maneuver gear. He rapped his fingers at it, noting that this particular canister was empty. The therapist jotted down some notes and encouraged Erwin to continue.

The second item was silk. It had to be. The texture was too soft and smooth between his fingers. He heard the command again and his eyes fluttered open. A cravat. Similar to what Levi used to wear years ago. This cravat was too white though, Levi's had been faded with wear. He smiled slightly at that and placed it next to the gas canister once again repeated his gesture for the next item.

The third item was clothing, a jacket to be more specific. It's material worn leather from overuse. The texture was very familiar to Erwin and he just about guessed what it was when he heard the therapist's voice. He opened his eyes like all the other items but recoiled sharply dropping the jacket as if it had burned him. Erwin never even realized he had unknowingly flinched back away from the object. The therapist's pen stilled mid-sentence, before saying he had found what was keeping Erwin awake at night as if he knew it would cause Erwin to react that way.

His therapist suggested that after his part in the war, Erwin had repressed all those memories he most wanted to forget. Shouldering a burden, if you will, that Erwin had yet forgiven himself for. His reaction to the portion of the maneuver gear was average for any soldier retired from combat and it told the therapist Erwin was not haunted by his duty to humanity. The cravat represented Humanity's Strongest who had grown quite close to the former commander. Yet again, his reaction was one of happiness. He feared not for Levi's safety anymore. The last item revealed to the therapist that Erwin's nightmares originated from one person who had played a major role throughout Erwin's life.

The therapist then told Erwin to tell his story, the story of the Survey Corps Commander, and in turn the story of Erwin Smith of how he lived his life and how he came to be here today. Talking, he told Erwin, was like the soul's way of letting go. Don't carry a burden that was never meant to be held on for so long. Sometimes, the therapist told him, you don't realize the weight of what you've been carrying until you feel its release.

The ex-commander nodded his head believing this to be the best advice.

"I'll start from the beginning then." Erwin spoke and again glanced at the fallen jacket which now laid on the ground, its symbol burning a memory alive in the deep pits of his mind. The symbol of whom was the dull, green horned horse of one of the three branches in the military.

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><p><strong>Year 836<br>Inside Wall Maria  
>Outer Farm Town - 1900hrs<strong>

"Give that back!" A furious boy yelled, his voice causing heads to turn but no one cared to venture to see what was causing him to yell like that.

If they had, they would have seen three older and much taller boys surrounding a short kid with their combined bodies forcing him into an alley way away from public. The kid had messy black hair, thin eyebrows, and sandy pale skin. His body was littered in scratches and his clothing was even worse for wear. A dirty tan shirt with black shorts that had more holes than Swiss cheese hung to his little frame.

"Please. I need that." The voice whined pathetically.

A chuckle followed soon after. "What will you do for it, huh?" A boy with light brown hair mocked.

"I said give it back!" The voice from earlier commanded making a grab for the item dangling from the brunette boy.

"Reach for it shrimp!" He responded holding the item further out of reach.

The boy was indeed stuck in a downhill situation. He was a good five inches shorter than the other boy who had a good sixty pounds on him. Also, he was indeed outnumbered three to one and odds were against him getting out of the incident without injury. Fury sparked deep within the kid as he watched his abuser. The bully's stupid meaty hand was wrapping around his property sending fear through him that it was sustain irreversible damage. That item was special to him. It was the only thing he had left of his father who had died to the monsters just on the other side of the wall.

"I said give it BACK!" The boy gave a well-placed kick to the bully's nether regions.

The bully dropped said item to fall forward clutching at the area now alive with pain. The shorter boy swiped the item from the wet alley floor to pull it close to his chest in fear they would take it away from him again. His companions had stood there stupidly for a moment before turning their attention to the boy who was attempting to make his escape now that his item was back in his possession. The boy with hair of ginger caught the kid's arm and forced him into the stone wall of the alley. The other boy with a bowl cut mirrored his action and grabbed the boy's other arm, helping hold him to the wall.

"Hold him still." The boy from the ground said biting back the pain to stand.

The restrained kid thrashed like a caught animal but he could not free himself. The brunette came closer with a sickening smile. The younger tried to call for help but bowl cut kid anticipated his action and slapped a hand over his mouth to silence him. It did the trick when a punch just under his rib cage forced him to yell out into the hand. Without time to recover, another punch followed, this one landing on his lower ribs. Tears began to well up in the corners of his eyes as he thought surely they would beat him to death. He didn't deserve this. He was just at the wrong place at the wrong time.

"Move your hand, Roderich." The attacking boy ordered his companion who nodded and removed his hand from the smaller boy's mouth.

"I'll teach you to mess with me." He snarled.

He raised his fist again aiming towards the kid's face just before a rock rebounded off his head to land beside him. His head whipped to the left, eyes wide and searching.

"Who the fuck threw that?!" He shouted.

Another rock soared through the air and hit his attacker square in the face forcing him to back up. This rock drew a cut and blood began to run down his face. Holding his head, he shared a glance with his friends before turning where the rock came from and speaking out again.

"Show yourself, coward!" He called out into the darkness.

"Coward am I?" The voice asked now coming from behind the bully. "What does that make you?"

The kid turned around in fear, his free hand clutching into a fist.

"Get out here so I can kick your ass!" He called out his tough kid persona fading.

A broken plate piece came sailing over his head to crash somewhere in the distance behind him. The object came so close to him to feel the wind of its passing. The bully glanced at the shattered porcelain and turned slowly back to the darkness.

"Run now. Because next time I won't miss." The voice ordered sharply from behind him once more sending the already injured bully slipping in the muck of the alley to get away.

His friends dropped the younger boy ungracefully to the ground in fear and followed their retreating leader with shouts of 'don't leave me behind' echoing back to the beaten kid. Silence followed their leave just leaving the beaten kid and his unknown savior. When the small boy was sure they wouldn't return, only then did his eyes leave where they exited the alley way to search for the person who saved him.

"Are you okay?" The voice asked from behind the darkness that lacked the hard edge from before.

"Yea." The shorter boy sniffed wiping his face, sliding down the wall to sit in the wet floor of the alley. "I'll be fine." Tears already running down his face as he tried to be brave.

The splashing of water reached his ears and he looked up to see a boy around his age with blonde hair and deep blue eyes.

"Why were they beating on you?" The voice from before asked but now was originating from this kid's mouth.

Completely ignoring the fact he was saved by another scrawny kid his age, the bruised boy answered.

"They took my father's patch." He stated simply raising a piece of cloth the size of his palm that held the emblem of two crossing wings.

The blonde kid leaned down to stare at the patch but not touch it.

"The Survey Corps?" He questioned, earning a nod from the other boy who placed in back into his pocket away from viewing eyes.

The blonde kid said nothing and instead slid down to sit next to the boy he had saved his eyes staring forward at the opposite wall. He spoke after some time.

"I see them come riding through town, you know? They go outside to bring the fight to the titans and are not stuck here like the rest of us." He explained. "I want to be like them. Free, not grounded. You understand?" He asked, just now looking at the boy next to him.

"Yea, me too." He responded. "But I'm afraid of those monsters out there. I can't be brave like that or like my father." He started to cry again hiding his face in his arms.

"Crybaby." The boy told him jokingly placing his hand on top of his head. "You don't have to be brave." The blonde encouraged. "We'll join together and I'll watch your back and you can watch mine!"

The kid beside him gave him a weird look. "But I don't even know you." He pointed out.

"Oh, yes! Sorry. I'm Erwin. Erwin Smith. And you are?" The blonde kid asked extending his hand.

The other boy looked questionably at the hand before taken in his own hesitantly. "Nile Dok."

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><p><strong>Year 840<br>Inside Wall Maria  
>Recruit Barracks - 0900hrs<strong>

He was eighteen years old sitting across from an older Nile who had muscled up since the day he relied on the help of a stranger to fight his own battle. The recruits both wore white long sleeve dress shirts with the idea if they died in battle at least they would go out in style. They also wore their Training Corps jackets displaying the crossing swords and had forgone the leather harness that was worn to be attached to maneuver gear. Nile's hair laid flat on his head neatly with Erwin's own bright blonde hair combed back that gave him a very professional look.

Nile's hand reached into his pocket to reveal a cigarette. He patted down the rest of his body trying to find a match stick or even lighter on him. Feeling the rectangular shape of said lighter, he flipped open the pocket. Just as the end of his cigarette was placed in his mouth, a hand swiped at it knocking it across the room. The white cylinder soared and rolled to a stop hitting the edge of the room.

"Those are bad for you." Erwin chided with a wiggle of his finger.

Nile's eyes narrowed in annoyance, replacing the lighter he had drawn from his breast pocket.

"Are you really going to do that every time I try to smoke?" He asked, lowering his hand back to the table.

Erwin only smiled and with a roll of his eyes, Nile turned his attention back to the chess match they were indulging in. The game was drawing to a close and it had only been thirty minutes. Erwin had once again backed him into a corner, one of which he couldn't escape from. He had lost his crucial piece moments before that eliminated any plan he made to retake control of the board. He could try running and using his last remaining pieces to block the king's retreat. But all that would do was draw the game out longer with the same ending as if he just stood his ground against Erwin's forces.

"Should I run or should I stay?" He questioned out loud to no one in particular.

His inevitable defeat loomed over head so it really didn't matter what move he made. Nile scratched his hairless chin before moving his pawn a space forward before leaning back with a tired sigh. Erwin smirked moving his knight quickly taking the pawn, once again showing his companion that he was always two moves ahead. Erwin's hand added his black pawn to the ever growing pile of captured pieces. Nile glanced over weakly at all his captured chess pieces.

"What do you think the meaning of life is..?" Nile asked randomly leaning forward once more to study the chess board.

A deep question may perhaps distract him to allow Nile to at least fight back in some way. To go down kicking and screaming as it may.

Erwin frowned in deep thought staring at the man across from him. "A logical answer or my own personal opinion?" He questioned.

Nile's slender fingers rubbed the rook piece before moving it to capture the knight Erwin had used to take his pawn. He had chosen to fight off Erwin's forces instead of running around the board.

"Can't it be both?" Nile reasoned leaning into his seat once more.

The blonde hummed across from him in agreement not at all bothered at losing his piece. "Well, in that case, my answer is this: there is none." He placed his own rook three spaces forward.

Nile scowled at the board as if the thing was his own personal enemy.

"And that's checkmate, Nile." Erwin smirked looking at the game board.

Nile rubbed his brow in defeat. "Just you wait, Erwin, one of these days I'll make a move that you won't be able to predict ahead of time. And when I do, I want you to remember this day where you felt oh so confident." Nile promised him with a knowing smile before flipping his own king over in surrender.

"I'll have one foot in the grave before that ever happens." Erwin responded sarcastically.

Nile stood waiting for his friend to join him. "Perhaps, but until then let's try and pass graduation in two years, eh?"

"It won't be hard." Erwin rose to his feet and led the two outside where many other recruits were milling about waiting for group practice to begin.

Erwin stopped just outside the door and turned to his friend. "You're joining the Survey Corps, right?"

"That's the plan. You, me, and Mike, wherever the hell he wandered off to. Unless something comes up otherwise.." Nile responded with a waggle of his eyebrows. "..you're stuck with me."

Erwin rolled his eyes pushing the shorter man forward to the training grounds for a long workout session that was overdue.

"You don't have to push me. Just tell me where we are going and I'll follow." Nile remarked sarcastically.

Erwin huffed. "I do what I want."

"Obviously." Nile said ducking out of his friend's hold.

"Seriously, walk faster. We are balancing today again and I want to pass inspection so I can use the actual gear." Erwin told him proceeding to use his longer legs to get further towards where other recruits were gathering.

The shorter soldier did not increase his pace and chose to instead make his steps slower. Erwin noticed this and stopped his brisk walk to stand with his arms crossed, an annoyed expression plastered across his face.

"Its still going to be there if we are late." Nile called out. "It doesn't really matter if we are first. We'll just be bored watching everyone else fail."

Nile paused just now reaching the taller blonde. He lifted an eyebrow as if to dare Erwin to try something, but a loud bellowing man interrupted their miniature stand off.

"Hey! Guys, wait up!" Mike called out from a distance, running into view with his uniform jacket barely hanging onto his form.

A hand came down sharply on Nile's back making him step forward from the force.

"Run Nile, run!" Erwin shouted shoving Nile forward as they both broke out into a sprint with Mike hot on their tails behind them.

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><p><strong>Year 842<br>Inside Wall Maria  
>Recruit Training Grounds - 0500hrs<strong>

"Pull up on your cables, Nile! No, not that way! To the left! The left-damn, it's like talking to an imbecile!" Erwin shouted. "You are going to hit a tree at this rate!" The blonde landed hard on a nearby tree limb.

The tree vibrated when Nile joined him. "Mind your own damn business. I can handle this. I'd worry more about your damaged gear."

Erwin shook his head in disagreement. "It's fine. I checked it twice. It didn't take any damage when I fell."

"I can see a dent in it!" Nile threw out his arm pointing to said dent in the rectangular box.

Erwin sheathed his swords to grab his gear and shove it in Nile's face. "Nile. It's the size of a thumb. It's not going to break apart on me in midair."

"You don't know that!" Nile insisted stubbornly.

Erwin threw his hands into the air dramatically. "It's not going to kill me. You, however, might with your reckless maneuvering. We barely made it over that tree!"

"You should not have followed me then." Nile pointed out as if it was obvious.

"Why the hell would I leave you to die alone of idiocy when I can prevent it?" Erwin told him.

"That's just the strangest thing." Nile said putting a finger to his chin before mockingly turning back to Erwin. "I don't remember asking for your opinion."

A third figure joined them nearly throwing them both off.

"Are you two arguing again?" Mike Zacharius asked, taking a whiff of the surrounding air.

Nile pushed Mike away from him and into Erwin. "Can you not be creepy for five minutes?" He asked.

"Can you not be a stuck up asshole for two minutes?" Mike countered.

Nile removed his blade. "Bend over and we'll see." A smirked made its way to his lips.

"At least I don't have pencil thin facial hair on my chin." Mike rebounded grabbing Nile's chin between his fingers.

Nile took hold of the hand touching his face and pinned it behind Mike's back forcing him forward. "Don't fucking touch me." He touched his own chin with a disappointed look. "I'm growing it out. It will take some time to be able to add a mustache." He whined. "It doesn't look bad, does it Erwin?"

"Oh my God." Erwin rolled his eyes then pinching the bridge of his nose before controlling his annoyed emotions just enough to answer. "It looks fine, Nile. Mike is just being as ass."

Mike struggled from his pinned position and yelled out. "Don't lie to him, Erwin!"

"May I remind you both that we have an objective to accomplish." Erwin moaned in defiance.

"Tell that to him." Nile jammed a finger in Mike's direction.

"Guys." Erwin said.

They both turned to him as Nile released Mike from his hold. "We know." Both Nile and Mike replied in unison which caused them to glare heatedly at each other.

Erwin feared another verbal thrashing between the two but was pleasantly surprised when none occurred.

"What's the plan, Captain?" Mike asked earning a raised eyebrow from Erwin.

"Captain?" Erwin questioned.

Mike threw an arm around his shoulders with a grin. "Yes, our unofficial group leader. So how are we going about this?"

Erwin nodded and crouched down on the tree with his companions following his move.

"The course objection is to eliminate ten out of the twenty 'titans' without losing a team member to pass graduation." Erwin started. "I think we can get all twenty. Our approach will start as the standard triple team formation but instead of following through with that, I think we should alter it. The further apart we are from each other, the more confusion it will cause to the instructors who are operating the dummy titans. Nile will flank from the right and Mike from the left. I'll go straight up the middle. We'll meet at the last titan." Erwin told them.

"Sounds good. How do we make it interesting?" Mike grinned.

Erwin smiled right back. "First one to eliminate the last titan wins."

Nile crossed his arms standing up. "Then what are we waiting for?"

The soldiers exchanged knowing looks before leaping from the tree limb activating their maneuver gear. Swords drawn, the trio flew through the tree eyes wide open and minds concentrated on their each respected targets.

"Here they come!" A Training instructor called out to the soldiers on the ground in charge of the fake titans.

Three soldiers came into view in a triangle like formation before a distinctive 'now' came from the blonde leading the group. His companions suddenly took off into different directions leaving just the leader to come up the middle. A whirring of cables sounded from the right where fellow trainees observed the first 'titan' to fall with two deep cuts in the base of its neck. Another crash sounded from the left as another 'titan' fell to the same assault.

"Shit." The instructor cursed. "They are surrounding the group."

One of the trio flew overhead eliminating the 'titan' the instructor was operating. The man let go of the rope he used to turn the fake titan watching the trainee go.

"Dammit." He stomped his foot. "They're making this look too easy."

Titans fell left and right with each hit deep enough to count the titan as disabled. Cables whirled along with the hiss of gas as the group got into each other's line of sight meeting up in the middle.

"Get ready to watch me win, Nile!" Mike called out flying over said person.

Nile released his dull blades to fall to the forest floor and replaced them with sharper ones. "In your dreams." He muttered using his gas to come up beside Mike.

"Mike! Nile!" Erwin called out below them barely avoiding Nile's spent blades. "Let's do this together!"

"Yes, Captain!" They called in unison once more as all three trainees raised their blades.

The last 'titan' came into view with the three friends sailing right for it at an incredible speed. With three separate cuts, they hit the final titan with such force that it completely disconnected the fake head from its body and leaving the ground trainees running for cover.

A smirk found its way on Nile's face as he landed on a nearby tree limb of a great oak as he watched trainees scream and run from the collapsed 'titan.' His swords were still in his hands, the blades dulled quite a bit with the amount of force he had thrown into that hit.

"Fucking hell!" Mike yelled above Nile on the same tree looking out in the distance.

Nile turned his head to Mike. "What is it?"

"Erwin just ate it!" Mike yelled then continued on explaining when Nile gave him a confused look. "Erwin's maneuver gear malfunctioned and he crashed landed over those two trees. He went down pretty hard and is probably stuck on the ground over there." Mike pointed to the vicinity. "I don't think the gear could of survived the impact." Mike responded, checking his own canisters attached to his gear. "And I'm out of gas." He added.

Nile crouched and pushed off the tree activating his own cables to pull him towards the area Mike had mentioned. He was over the trees in seconds, his eyes searching for the idiot blonde who didn't heed his advice. On the other side of the two trees was a complete different landscape. The trees thinned out around a rather small clearing that had bright green grass growing and dancing with the gentle breeze. A long straight path seemed dug into the ground that ripped the grass from the soil. The loose soil and upturned vegetation looked like an absolute wreck. One sword from the maneuver gear was thrown to the side of the trail and the other was missing completely from view. Metals pieces from the failed gear formed a trail to Erwin, whom was momentarily trying to release the rest of the gear from his person. The blonde was sitting down near the farthest edge of the clearing with one leg propped up bending at the knee. His jacket was stained green from the landing and his hair had collected a lot of dirt along with some twigs. The man was cursing as he fumbled with the harness around his waist that wouldn't release the crumpled gear. It would have been an amusing sight if Erwin's left pant leg wasn't stained red.

Nile used his gas again to slow his descend to the clearing and broke out into a run when his feet touched the earth. His swords sheathed once he landed, Nile was at Erwin's side helping him remove the gear that was still hot to the touch from the slide in.

"Don't say anything." Erwin warned him, a stubborn frown on his lips.

Nile removed a pocket knife from his uniform pocket and began cutting the maneuver gear off the harness. "I wasn't going to." Nile replied.

Erwin started unclipping the belts around his thigh that laid on top of the blood soaked pant leg. Nile succeeded in removing the destroyed gear, discarding it somewhere behind him and kneeled beside Erwin to use the knife to cut the pant fabric open in order to see the wound.

"It's a flesh wound." Erwin said, carefully removing the cut fabric from his skin. "I landed on my fucking sword when I fell."

"What happened?" Nile asked, replacing his knife back into his pocket watching Erwin reveal his wound.

The bleeding had picked up some with the belts no longer acting as a tourniquet to slow the blood flow. The wound was a clean cut on the side of his thigh ranging about four to six inches long. Luckily, the injury was only a centimeter deep and no artery was affected. If the cut had been any higher, they would have been in deep shit. Erwin moved more of the pant fabric from the wound and tried to push the dirt away from his leg so the cut wouldn't get infected.

"The cable on my right line snapped." Erwin said answering Nile's question as he recalled the events. "Then all the weight on the left line jammed the reel so I fell like a rock. It happened so fast, I couldn't let go of the swords fast enough." He clenched his teeth in pain. "It might need stitches too." He noted glancing at the wound once more.

Nile was shrugging out of his jacket, with a grim line on his face. The jacket was then wrapped around Erwin's injured leg. Nile used the jacket sleeves to tie the whole thing to his friend's thigh before sitting back with a exhausted sigh. He wiped the perspiration from his brow that was beginning to gather in the heat of day.

"That will ruin your jacket." Erwin told him gazing blankly at his leg.

"I don't care." Nile responded.

"Hmm." Erwin hummed to himself as if waiting for something.

"I told you the gear was shit. Why didn't you listen to me?" Nile asked his voice reprimanding but amused.

Erwin grinned. "Ah, there it is." Nile rolled his eyes at his comment. "I thought it would hold until the end of the exercise." Erwin paused. "But I was wrong."

"What was that?" Nile smirked. "You were what? I didn't hear you."

"I was wrong. Now shut your stupid face and wipe that smirk off your mouth." Erwin commanded shifting his position to get less pressure off his wounded leg.

"Tch." Nile clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth before looking back where he came from to rescue Erwin.

A small smile crept up Erwin's face before he spoke. "So where is Mike?"

"Out of gas stuck on some tree." Nile deadpanned.

"And you left him there?" Erwin questioned, amusement in his voice.

"Yes." Nile said. "I still would of left him there even if you had landed safely."

It was quiet for moment before both men doubled over laughing trying to imagine Mike's face at being abandoned on a very tall oak tree. Erwin was trying to still his laughs as if not to open the wound some more but his efforts were failing. Still laughing, Nile managed to remove his flare gun and fire a round into the air painting a yellow trail into the sky that would give their location to the rescue team that would be dispatched to find them.

* * *

><p><strong>Year 840<br>Inside Wall Rose  
>Just outside of Trost - 2300hrs<strong>

A hand roughly seized his collar and slammed the man's back into a nearby brick wall. The blow cracked his head up against the stone, the rocks slicing into his scalp. Nile reacted quickly by kicking out at the man holding him but the blows never landed. Trying a new tactic, he dug his nails into the hands holding him willing himself to cause the attacker enough pain to release him. But again the man did not budge from his strangle hold. Nile ground his teeth together bringing his arms up to knock the arms away but froze when light hit his assailant's face. He dropped his arms to his side limply as the fingers holding him grew tighter threatening to choke the life out of him. Nile opted for a scowl to express his displeasure at being manhandled. The only sound besides the white noise was Nile's heavy breathing.

"You lied." His assailant finally spoke, his voice accusing.

"No." Nile said. "I didn't." He hissed through his teeth when the fingers began to slide up to his jugular.

"You promised." The voice insisted.

Nile's own hand shot up to grip loosely at his attacker's shirt. "I didn't promise anything. My path has changed, I've met someone who means a lot to me. I want to be there for her and not leave everyday with her never knowing if I will return." His voice grew with anger. "I've found my meaning of life, why don't you?! I want to live, not die for no fucking reason! Why can't you understand that?!" He asked in sheer desperation as the hand holding him had begun to constrict around his throat.

"Our goal was to fight for humanity, to fight for our freedom." He spoke his eyes blazing with an unstoppable fire. "Whatever happened to that?! You're afraid, aren't you?!"

"We will never be free!" Nile snarled, his outcry loosening his attacker's grip. "Don't you realize that by now? Those wings on your back are nothing more than an ideology, something that will always be just out of reach of our hands." He spoke softly now, the anger dying away. "You can spread your wings and fly, but soon you'll come crashing back to earth and be back in this cage like the rest of us."

Nile shoved the hand off of him that had long grown limp. The man took a step back, his eyes downcast. Nile's own hand rubbed weakly at his throat where red splotches would soon develop. He fixed his jacket wiping at dirt that wasn't there and turned to leave displaying a horned horse across his back.

"You rather hide behind Wall Sina like a coward then die as your father did." The man bit out.

Nile tensed then pulled his jacket further around his body to block out the night chill. He breathed out, smoke billowing in front of him.

"No." He affirmed. "I don't want to watch my friends die in front of me. Watch as all our memories fade away like the light leaving their eyes as they draw their last breath." Nile tilted his head to the side to stare back at the man. "I don't want to watch _you_ die." He confessed with no emotion. "If that makes me a coward, then I suppose I am."

"Nile.." He tried only to be stopped by Nile's voice.

"Enjoy your flight, before the weight of everyone's hopes and dreams come crashing down around you." Nile told him and walked out toward the end of the alley way into the street.

"Goodbye, Erwin."

* * *

><p><strong>Year 850<br>Undisclosed Location  
>Survey Corps Headquarters - 1830hrs<strong>

The clicking of boots drew his attention to the wooden door seconds before it was thrown open. The door rattled slamming into the opposite wall before someone reached it and once again slammed it to close it. A tall, slender man stepped up to the desk perched in the room immediately sitting in the chair across Erwin with a huff.

"What do I owe the pleasure of the Commander of the Military Police?" The blonde man questioned, never glancing up from his report.

Just the sound of pen scratching was heard for a few moments before said man responded.

"I heard the expedition outside the walls was a failure again." He started as if treading on thin ice.

Erwin's pen stilled before continuing to write.

"And? Will you be making your point soon? Or do I have to guess what it is..?" Erwin spoke, his voice calm and controlled not revealing his true emotions.

The man across from him breathed out heavily. "Why is it that you can win just about every chess match you take on but fail when it comes to this war?"

Giving up on the report at the moment, Erwin put the pen down and stared at his old friend. His uniform was wrinkled so bad that it mirrored his hair which stuck up at different ends. The red bolo tie hung low on his neck and his eyes drooped down as if he hadn't slept in days. The facial hair he had acquired had grown out showing signs of low maintenance on its up-keep. He was even fidgeting slightly despite trying to appear calm and in control. Nile didn't match at all the pampered lifestyle of those residents of Wall Sina. He sat with his arms crossed and eyes glued to a spot somewhere behind Erwin's own head refusing to make eye contact.

Deciding not to question the man's obvious rough appearance, Erwin contemplated his answer before speaking.

"In chess there are rules, every piece follows every command despite what the outcome will be of such an action. In the real world, there are no rules and chess completely overlooks the human factor of error. In other words, real soldiers don't behave as chess pieces. Orders will be disobeyed and mistakes will be made. We are playing a whole new game in this war for humanity." He paused glancing over at Nile who had not moved. "Now what it your real reason for being here?"

The man visibly flinched, uncrossing his arms.

"Tch." Nile clicked his tongue displaying his unconscious habit. "I was in the area and thought I'd drop by; see how you're doing I guess. But I know when I'm not welcomed." He rose to his feet to make a hasty retreat and crossed the room towards the door.

"Tell the Mrs. Dok, 'hello' for me, will you?"

Nile froze if someone had stabbed him before recovering. "I will. Tell that Corporal of yours 'hello' as well." Nile spoke attempting to throw Erwin off guard but came up short.

"Mike's dead." Erwin deadpanned with no emotion.

Nile drew a sharp breath, he already knowing from the report sent to center command but hearing it again tore at him. The printed words still haunting his mind from when he read them: **Squad Leader Mike Zacharius of the Survey Corps killed in action due to a titan ambush on Expedition No. 54**. That's all that was written for him in the record. There were no details of his last moment; just a bunch of empty words placed against a name. He would never tell the man behind him that he checked that report every day for the past ten years to make sure they didn't die on him without him ever knowing. Was it wrong of him to feel relieved that Erwin's name had yet to appear even when Mike's finally did?

"I know." He responded so low, he didn't think Erwin heard him.

"I'm still alive. Nice of you to check." Erwin announced revealing Nile's true motive for his visit.

"Hmm." Nile hummed thoughtfully at being figured out so easily.

The door opened and closed with Nile's departure leaving Erwin alone once more to finish his paperwork.

* * *

><p><strong>Year 855<br>Undisclosed Location  
>Survey Corps Headquarters - 1200hrs<strong>

A knock sounded on the wooden door before the handle turned and the door groaned open. A fully uniformed military commander walked in his boots scuffing against the floorboards. In the far corner of the room stood the person or persons he had come to see. Erwin was leaning back against his wooden chair just enough so the feet of the chair came off the ground. He rocked both himself and the chair back onto four legs once seeing Nile. His companion, the short Corporal of the Survey Corps, was perched on top the edge of the desk facing Erwin. Levi never moved or looked over to acknowledge he had heard the intruder's approach. Parchment was placed out in front of Erwin giving the allusion that work was being done. Yet, the quill and ink were nowhere on the table.

A cough. "Sorry to interrupt." Nile started, stopping in the middle of the room. "We have some business to discuss, Erwin."

Levi moved then, his body rotating to face him while his feet still dangled from the desk. His expression held the seriousness it usually did but something behind his eyes was fading, a different emotion Nile could not quite place.

"I'll see to it that Jaeger cleans the stables again." He told Erwin excusing himself from the room with a grace that no man should have.

The door closed shut with a firm comment of 'get out of my way' spoken to the other military policemen outside the room.

A sad smile grew on Nile's lips tilting his head slightly to the right.

"You should probably tell him before its too late." Nile reasoned.

"It's already too late." Erwin smiled to himself. "I know why you are here, Nile."

Of course he did, he planned it that way, Nile thought.

"It can wait." He insisted, giving his old friend one last chance.

"No." Erwin spoke standing up. "It can't. We both knew this day would come. Just a matter of where and when." He explained. "Do your job, Commander Dok." His voice becoming serious losing the edge of familiarity they once had.

Nile stared at such a display with dejected eyes. Since he joined the Military Police he really hadn't been any happier. Although life was relatively simple behind Wall Sina, he missed his friends and the comfort they once brought him. After the passing of Mike Zacharius, Erwin was the only one left who held such a place in his heart. But like all hard choices, he had to put duty above his own personal gain. Even if it made him hate himself inside.

The Commander of the Military Police brought his boot to the ground in a loud click passing an unspoken message for at that moment the door opened once more. Nile's eyes hardened as he approached to stand behind Erwin. Two more Military Police soldiers advanced in the room rifles in hand as rope wrapped around the only hand Erwin had left. Erwin was pushed forward onto the top of the desk as the bindings were secured to him.

"Commander Erwin Smith, you have been deemed a traitor to humanity and are to be restrained and brought in for interrogation. Do you comply?" Nile spoke his voice mechanical as if he has said the words many times before.

Nile Dok yanked him up back to his feet after the rope was tied, securing his hand from movement.

"Yes." He replied calmly as the other two soldiers flanked him.

Their little convoy marched out of his office and down a flight of stairs. The guard soldiers kept glancing around about them to insure that no Survey Corps members were hanging around. To have a fight break out between the two branches would just cause more unnecessary trouble. The watchful eye wasn't needed, Erwin predicted this move ahead of time and all Survey Corps soldiers were on a curfew tonight. Yet that didn't stop some from ignoring his command and choose to hide out in the shadows and watch. Erwin could vaguely see Armin behind a cabinet as they walked past. That kid was truly too smart for his own good and if he was here, his other two friends were not far off. Erwin hoped for their sake, Levi had indeed distracted Eren who could not control himself when the time called for it. He was led down another flight of steps to be stuck between two more armed Military Police guardsmen. Erwin raised an eyebrow at the amount of soldiers he was seeing towards Nile. It wasn't out of the ordinary to bring this many men in case of a struggle but surely Nile knew that he would not bother resisting. Something was off. Nile was being cautious for another reason, but what was it?

Not even two steps in the walk outside the building Erwin tilted his head towards Nile upon noticing something in the courtyard.

"What is the meaning of that?" Erwin asked his voice holding malice as he glared at the Military Police Commander.

Nile frowned glancing out the window to where Erwin was pointing. Four Military Police soldiers were wrestling a smaller man with printed wings on his back to the ground. The outnumbered man refused to be manhandled and was causing quite a situation. The man even managed to disarm all the soldiers trying to apprehend him. One MP already laid unconscious on the ground nearby, as another soldier pressed a cloth to his head in attempt to soak up the blood. A fifth man joined the brawl but quickly used more primitive methods to control the situation. He slammed the butt of his rifle into the small man's head easily diffusing the fight when the figure crumpled to the stone floor. Two soldiers climbed onto his back, their knees digging into his prone form while tying his limp hands together.

Erwin recoiled backwards bumping into one of the soldier's guarding him. With a curse he moved to attack Nile in anger but a rifle pointed to his forehead stilled him from choking the life out of Nile. A member of the Military Police released the safety on his weapon still aiming it to fire into his skull if Erwin showed signs of hostility again. Nile Dok stood a few feet away his arms crossed and a smile posted upon his face.

"Corporal Levi has been charged with conspiracy against humanity and his majesty, the king." He told him. "Did you really think I would ignore his proximity to a traitor?" Nile asked with a raise of his eyebrow.

Erwin approached Nile ignoring the gun trained on him. With a wave of his hand, the Military Police Commander called off the soldiers moving to intercept him. Erwin stopped his face close to Nile's.

His labored breath blew across his face. "Why are you doing this?" His voice steady but contained an undertone of desperation.

Nile stared back unmoving.

"You are to be taken to holding where then you will be tried for your crimes. Do you comply?" Nile asked again mechanically.

Fury sparked through Erwin at Nile's obvious indifference. Who the fuck was this man?! It certainly wasn't an old friend. He dare call him the traitor, when Nile himself went back on his promise?! His calm mask fell apart in seconds revealing how he really felt.

"The fucking hell I will!" He snarled launching his body at Nile.

A loud crack echoed against the room as the back end of a rifle came down on Erwin. The man fell to his knees before falling over on his side, his vision rapidly darkening. Nile stood in the same spot never moving an inch but his voice still reached him even as the darkness consumed his vision.

"You don't really know what you have until you lose it." Nile mocked him before even his voice was lost to the nothingness void.

* * *

><p><strong>Year 855<br>Inside Wall Sina  
>Military Court - 0900hrs<strong>

"Guilty." A voice echoed with the cracking of a gravel. "You are hereby to be put to death for your crimes against humanity. Please rid this man from my courtroom."

The verdict to Erwin as a logical stand point was just a minor setback. He has time to sort out this bureaucratic red tape he was wrapped up in. He had long predicted an outcome such as this and just needed to adjust his next move. From his own personal view, Erwin was disappointed that they would be so quick to overlook his efforts for humanity. It was quite sad really. In this world if something scared you, you killed it, no questions asked.

"Will you be there when the axe comes down?" Erwin asked his eyes downcast as he was led out of the room to cross a courtyard back to his cell with Nile escorting him.

Nile stiffened and looked to the sky in deep thought before answering, his voice holding more confidence then Erwin has heard in a while.

"Yes."

* * *

><p><strong>Year 855<br>Inside Wall Sina  
>Military Police Holding Cells - 1200hrs<strong>

The curious thing about Erwin was he would plan everything down to a single detail. No stone went unnoticed or analyzed. He'd revise and edit and revise again when the situation called for it. His mind worked just like a chess match even if he didn't know it himself. You could back him into a corner but he wouldn't stop fighting even when everything seemed against him. That's what made him a great commander and an even greater leader. Even now in the face of execution, Erwin would be bidding his time figuring out a plan to turn the tables for him instead of against him. Hope and faith had nothing to do with it, logic was the key according to Erwin.

Yet that great strength of Erwin's made it obvious of his weakness. Nile wouldn't have directly picked up on it if it hadn't been for all those chess games Erwin forced him to endure. See, as long as Erwin had something to fight for, he would not stop; he would not back down and he would not stop planning to reverse the situation. Despite how hopeless the situation was, he'd fight until he had nothing to left fight with. And even then he'd go down planning his attacker's downfall in the slim chance he would survive. In chess, it would be to save the bishop to use later, or even protect the pawn so it can eventually be promoted into a queen once reaching the end of the board. He displayed the same behavior time and time again in his missions outside the walls. The same goal in mind and the same pieces to protect.

However, in real life, sometimes it wasn't how good the player was but who the player was. Especially in politics. Erwin hadn't been in the meeting he had or heard what those 'people upstairs' pulling the strings were planning. No plan of Erwin's would work because it didn't matter that Erwin had been deemed a traitor. He was a wild card to the royal family, someone who didn't kiss ass and played by his own agenda. They wanted Erwin dead even if he never was convicted as a quote on quote 'traitor to humanity.' And for that reason, for Nile's own strategy to work, he needed Erwin to stop playing the game or risk him fucking it all up. So Nile Dok did the best move he could make; he captured Erwin's king and called checkmate.

"Corporal Levi has been sentenced to death and is to be executed five days before you at 1210hrs." Nile remarked to Erwin who was laying against the brick wall.

The man reacted immediately. His head flipped over to stare at Nile, his dirty hair falling in front of his eyes from his seated position on the floor.

"You're lying." He stated calmly.

"I wish I was." Nile responded evenly.

Erwin peered at him again. "You wouldn't have enough evidence to hold him. I left a trail to be followed back to me, not him." He affirmed more to himself than to Nile.

"Erwin, why would I lie?" Nile reasoned. "I'm telling you just how I see it. The Military Police has enough on him to tie you and him together."

"Like what?" Erwin asked, still not convinced in the least.

"Levi's underground business..? Surely, you haven't forgotten what he did for a living before joining the Survey Corps, and neither has the Military Police. Corporal Levi has a criminal record a mile long." Nile responded.

"A trail of which that has long gone cold." Erwin told him. "The Military Police hasn't acted on that knowledge in a decade and wouldn't concern themselves in such affairs unless there was something else." He finalized. "That of which brings us back to why I'm here. So what is the real reason the Military Police wants Levi dead?"

Nile Dok leaned forward looking through the bars. "Erwin, I don't know all the details despite what you think. You know as well as I that the Military Police doesn't need solid evidence to kill someone. If they want someone dead, they're dead."

"Then stop it." Erwin commanded.

Nile ran a hand threw his black locks.

"I can't."

A cracking sound echoed through the holding cell as Erwin punched the wall with his chained hand.

"Don't feed me your bullshit lies, Nile. You have the power as the Commander of the Military Police." He shouted, his eyes sparking a fire just like the time when they arrested him.

"Not when the order comes from the king himself." Nile told him.

Erwin answered without delay, gazing at the dark ceiling.

"You said five days before mine, correct?" Erwin interrupted his eyebrows drawn together in thought.

How predictable. It was just as Nile had thought. Erwin was trying to formulate a new plan to now include Levi's situation. It would all be in vain, though. For once in his life, Nile was a step ahead of Erwin. He had to hold back the smile of glee once Erwin realized a critical detail he was overlooking.

"My own execution is five days from now." He paused. "Which means.."

"Corporal Levi will be killed today in a matter of minutes." Nile said for him.

The man was on his feet before being pulled back to where he was chained to.

"You son of a bitch!" He screamed thrashing about. "You waited until now! What the fuck is your problem?!"

He struggled with the chain attached to the wall before breaking out into a complete panic, his heart knowing he had something to lose if he didn't fight. Logic that Erwin prided himself with would do him no justice because he had no power to work with. Right now, at this moment, he was just a man. A man who was about to lose everything he held dear.

"Don't do this! Don't do this to me." He tried again and again to free his hand before turning to Nile. "You know how I feel about him, Nile. Stop it, please God, stop it!"

"I can't."

"What if it was your wife?! Your children?!" Erwin shouted staring straight into Nile as if he could see his soul.

Nile grabbed onto the bars in front of him. "Erwin, I can't save him. I'm sorry-" He was cut off.

"You won't even try! I would do it for you, Nile. I'd always do anything you asked of me, why won't you help me?!" His eyes alive with pain, confusion, and most of all fear.

Hands bleed white as he gripped the bars. "I CAN'T!" Nile ended up yelling back.

"Stop saying that!" Erwin ordered, his eyes darting around the room to find something, anything to use to free himself.

Nile's hands loosen from the bars a bit. "Erwin, I don't want this to happen anymore than you, but I have no power over this."

"I love him!" Erwin yelled finally admitting it out loud and even to himself while he continued kicking out at the wall trying to loosen the stone. "Nile, please. Don't let this happen. I'm supposed to die, not him. Never him." He begged desperation clear in his voice.

"Erwin-" Nile started before he was interrupted by the sound of five different shots from a multiple rifles in the distance.

Erwin froze staring off in the direction of the noise.

"W-what time is it?" Erwin asked his voice shaky in disbelief.

Nile gazed down at his boots before answering. "1210hrs."

The first emotion to cross Erwin's face was panic that melted into denial soon after. It wasn't too long after, his eyes grew vacant. Erwin was a logical man and all reason gave him the conclusion Nile wanted him to have. His old friend didn't even look alive anymore. The fire in his eyes was extinguished like pinching out a candle. He had stopped fighting just as Nile had wanted. But seeing the effects of what his plan did to Erwin in person was almost more than he could take. Erwin was still his best friend despite the distance between them and contrary to what Erwin and everyone else thought, Nile never stopping protecting him from harm.

Nile stilled his hand that was inching to comfort his first friend. There was no other way, he had a role to play and he would act until the lie became the truth.

"In time-"Nile started. "You will understand why I waited to tell you."

"I fucking hate you." Erwin said at last his voice lacking the vigor it held earlier. "Get the hell out of here you murdering bastard."

Nile was silent. "Erwin.."

"Don't you fucking talking to me. You are no friend of mine." Erwin told him, curling inward on himself.

Nile clicked his tongue and turned to leave Erwin with his thoughts. Erwin never seeing the look of loss and determination hidden behind Nile's eyes.

* * *

><p><strong>Year 855<br>Wall Rose  
>The Gallows - 1650hrs<strong>

Five members of the Military Police's best stood in line, their rifles clutched tightly against their shoulders. The man made weapons reflected the falling sun's rays to shine down on the damned who would receive the bullets they held. The soldiers' eyes were firmly attached to the dark figure of the executioner whom of which would be the one to call the order to end his life. The wooden stage where he was at was raised on stilts so those of the 'respected' portion of the military could view the carrying of justice. High officers of the Garrison and the Military Police talked amongst themselves as if this was some great event. None of the Survey Corps were here, which meant they were not allowed in or even they had given up on trying to formulate a plan to rescue him. He also couldn't forget to mention the entire show was perched on top of Wall Rose. A fitting end to one such as him to be devoured by the titans he swore to destroy. After the execution, soldiers were to throw his body over the wall. A way out fit for a 'traitor' to be dishonorably discharged from service of his majesty, the king.

Nile had come, just as he promised all those days ago, and was dressed to the part of a Military Commander with a pressed jacket, clean white pants, polished boots, and his hair newly trimmed to boot. He was even decked out in his very own set of maneuver gear, oiled and greased for it had never seen the light of battle. As head of his particular branch, he needed not to be here to witness the execution of a rogue soldier, but yet there he stood he's body at ease. He was standing near Erwin watching the firing squad with half open eyes.

Erwin himself was on his knees dressed in full uniform as well even with a maneuver gear harness. The arm he had left was restrained by rope wrapped tightly around a wooden pole jutting out from the middle of the stage. His jacket once worn with pride, now hugged him as a reminder that his wings were clipped; nothing but a dream to fade away. Nile had insisted to the officials he die as he would be remembered: a military Commander who led thousands of men. Men who he would visit when he paid back in debts in hell.

"Commander Erwin Smith." A voice rang out. "Thirteenth Commander of the Survey Corps, you have been charged with high treason, reckless endangerment, and multiple counts of manslaughter. A jury of you peers.." The snarky voice continued on.

The wry Ex-Commander lowered his head, fatigue boring at the edges of his vision. Erwin had to resist the overwhelming urge to scoff at that. 'A jury of his peers' was a complete load of bullshit. One man made the decision and one made had decided his fate. To die from the hand of man rather then the titans he swore to destroy seemed to mock all he stood for. Maybe it was for the best. He was tired, tired of it all. The war had killed him and the surrounding world had crushed his spirit. The soldier inside him had continued to fight despite the rest of him dying. There was nothing left, everyone he once knew had abandoned him to be the last of his generation to fall.

Countless numbers of his superiors, back in the day when he was just a Survey Corps member, were gone. Mike was gone. Levi was gone, his only real ray of hope in this world. And Nile had betrayed him time and time again. He guessed this would be what it would feel like to die from the inside outwards. Death would be welcoming, easy, not quite falling asleep but fading away as if he never really existed in the first place.

"Raise his head!" A voice barked.

A rough hand found its way to his throat before traveling up to grab his hair and pull back forcing his eyes forward. With a growl, his eyes narrowed at the man holding him.

"Nile." He hissed, glaring at the old friend turned enemy who held him.

Nile said nothing, his eyes remained fixed to Erwin's executioner.

"As I was saying." The man continued. "You have been sentenced to death and are to be executed by firing squad today five hours after noon. Do you have any last words, Erwin Smith?"

A small smile broke across his parched lips. He was ready now, he had already served his time in his own personal hell.

No one understood what he meant as he muttered, "Finally."

The resolve in his voice caused Nile to glance at him before releasing his head roughly and rising to his feet. He took a couple steps away from Erwin's prone figure.

"I never knew you to be one to allow the king to be checkmated so easily." Nile spoke his body turned away from his old friend but the words still reached Erwin.

A curt laugh escaped his lips. "If this is checkmate, I guess you win at last, eh Nile?"

"I wish." Nile said. "There is still one more move to be played and it's my turn." He smiled slightly, moving to stand flanking his right at attention.

Erwin raised an eyebrow. Leave it to Nile to be vague as ever in his answers, even when seconds from now it would no longer matter. Dismissing the last move to be his death, Erwin leaned back into the pole closing his eyes letting the darkness be the last thing he ever saw.

"Guard, Ready!" A voice bellowed.

"Yes, sir!" A group of men responded with a slap of metal on skin and vas click of a pins loading into chambers.

"Guard, Aim!" The voice called again.

"Yes, sir!" The group responded, clothes rustling.

A sigh left Erwin's lips.

"Guard!" Silence filled the area as they awaited the order to fall.

"Fire!" The voice barked as the sound gunfire filled the air.

The sound reached him before he felt it. Then Erwin felt the slickness of blood running down his chest and dripping onto his knees, most likely staining his pants a brilliant crimson. He even felt some of the blood splatter across his own face to leave a gruesome aftermath. Erwin waited for the sharp pain and the eventual blackness in vain for it never came. A knife cut through his bindings with haste causing his eyes to snap open. Nile was kneeling close in front of him, a knife in his hand. The man grunted before pulling Erwin up to stand and pushing him backwards to the edge of the wall. Erwin's eyes were wide in confusion and disbelief, mirroring the soldiers across from him as Nile pushed him further and further backwards. Then in a matter of seconds they were both falling. The edge of the wall left his field of vision as Erwin realized Nile had pushed them both off Wall Rose.

The surprised shouts from above disappeared to be replaced with the whipping of air past his ears. Hands were at his waist strapping metal clips to his harness as they fell suspended in the free fall to the earth. Metal boxes hit against his side as the wind currents pushed Nile's gear into him.

"What are you doing?!" He shouted above the rushing wind.

A low gurgled laugh. "They won't look for a dead man, Erwin." Nile responded. "No one will survive this fall."

Leather tightened around his waist and metal clicking was heard as the hands stilled their actions.

"Except you." Nile told him, his hand badly clutching Erwin's waist to keep them together as they fell.

Looking at his body, Erwin recoiled with dark surprise that Nile had transferred his maneuver gear to his person.

"Nile..?"

"Corporal Levi will be waiting east side of the wall to get you the rest of the way." He said quickly.

Levi was dead. What was he talking about?!

"Nile?!" Erwin shouted trying make sense of what was happening.

"They say the fear of death follows from the fear of life, Erwin, and that a man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time." His voice was close to his ear now.

A hand grabbed Erwin's and forced him to grip the sword handle of the maneuver gear drawing the weapon as Nile's other hand patted his Survey Corps patch over Erwin's heart reminding him of that day they first met.

"I'm not afraid anymore, Erwin." The hand holding his, tightened and pressed into the handle activating his cable line.

Two cables launched out of his waist and imbedded themselves into the wall they had fell off. The metal cord halted its reeling and locked up. Erwin's body was jerked to stop as the gear held his weight, but Nile's body kept going. The Military Police Commander had released Erwin from his grasp the moment the anchors had hit the wall. Erwin felt the weight of Nile leave him and attempted to shift his body to grab Nile with his arm that was currently holding his sword. Yet, his action was too late as Nile was more than an arm's length away with this stupid peaceful smile on his face. In a blind panic, Erwin's leg slammed into the wall as he craned his head and searched for the falling soldier that left his vision for a split second. He hung dangling from the wall, dread filling him. He could only watch; be a spectator in a situation he no longer had control over.

They were too close to the ground.

"NILE!" Erwin shouted.

Nile Dok continued his free fall to the earth and Erwin finally got a real look at him. The man was painted red, his white long sleeve shirt liquid crimson. Blood fell with him, floating in the air as his wounds had not stopped bleeding. He flipped in the air falling face first and for a second Erwin thought he saw wings of blood falling from his back. The overhead canopy of trees were quickly coming up to meet Nile's falling body. He rotated once more in the air exposing his front to Erwin's stunned gaze. Nile's eyes were closed, the same smile still on his face and he now fell head first towards the ground as if his impending death was no big event he should witness to see. Nile disappeared from view when he hit the trees leaving a dumbfound Erwin behind.

His eyes blankly staring down, Erwin slammed a hand to his chest only to discover he was covered in blood but he had no bullet holes. Not even a scratch. Erwin stared at the red that coated his fingers where he had touched his shirt and jacket. Clenching his blood covered fist, his skin paled as a overwhelming urge to vomit clung to him. It wasn't his blood he felt earlier when those rifles sounded. A sick feeling crept up to him when he began drawing the conclusions together. It was _Nile's_.

Erwin spotted movement near the outskirts where Nile had made his last appearance. Two titans, an eight meter class and ten meter class, had also watched Nile fall and were heading straight for him. They swayed as they ran like children towards his friend's body that Erwin could not longer even see. Erwin snapped his teeth together glaring out at them his eyes full of hatred. How dare they?

"Get the fuck AWAY from HIM!" Erwin yelled out, clenching the sword handle tight in his hand.

The two titans ignored him and his command and disappeared into the thick mass of trees where Nile was. Erwin positioned himself to launch off the wall but a sudden thought stilled him and left his arm hanging limply in despair. His blade clicked as it hit the concrete gravel of Wall Rose. It didn't matter if he killed the titans. It wouldn't save Nile. If the fall hadn't killed him then surely the bullets wounds would leave him to bleed out. No, Erwin finalized, Nile Dok was long dead before he even made it to the ground.

The whirling of cables and spending of gas grabbed his attention from the forest he was staring at. A body nearly slammed into him but stilled.

"Well, I'll be damned that rat said you would be here." A familiar voice sighed.

Erwin glanced to his right as he'd seen a ghost. His eyes blown wide with dark surprise and his heart thudding wildly in his chest.

"Levi..?"

Said man titled his head, his bangs falling in front of his eyes from being in the awkward position on the wall.

"Uh, yes. That's me." Levi rotated closer from his hanging position. "Are you injured?" He asked concern filling his eyes as he scanned Erwin's body for the cause of crimson stain.

"Not my blood.." Erwin heard himself mutter. "I thought you were dead." He said sadness still clinging to him at having let go of Levi once realizing he could not save him.

A thin black eyebrow rose. "Why? We thought you were dead. You were supposed to be killed, remember?"

"How are you here?!" Erwin cried out. "Is this some kind of sick joke?" He reached out grabbing Levi's arm fearing he would vanish.

"Whoa." Levi muttered patting Erwin's only arm. "Nile told me to meet you here, you big ass tree. Said you would be clinging to the wall and to come rescue your ass before you started thinking too hard." Levi glanced down. "Whatever the hell he meant by that."

"But your were arrested and to be executed.." Erwin trailed off.

Levi recoiled slightly. "Is that what's got you so worked up? Someone has been feeding you false information. I wasn't executed, they didn't even have any evidence to make their charge stick." He shifted his feet on the wall. "I almost got assault charges after I woke up though." His eyes narrowed. "Hit me in the head with a gun will you, filthy dogs.."

"But five days ago…I heard them kill you." Erwin spoke his tone deep with emotion. "1210hrs.. I heard the rifles.." He muttered to himself, remembering.

Levi gave him a weird look before nodding his head and responding. "Ahhh, let me see, five days ago at 1210hrs, you said?" He confirmed. "Yes, Hange and I were near you trying to plead your case, but they wouldn't listen. The Military Police wouldn't even let us visit you before the execution; a direct command from their Commander, apparently. And if I remember correctly they had some of the MPs doing a practice shot for your execution."

"Practice shot?" Erwin was looking back where he last saw Nile.

"Yes. Then Nile Dok comes waltzing out of the holding cells with this crestfallen expression and telling me to meet you here at this moment. He didn't elaborate any further and just walked away from us." Levi explained. "I thought he was full of shit but Hange told me just to check it out since there could be no harm in it."

Erwin pinched his eyes together tightly, his brain reeling trying to process all the new information. "He lied. Again." Erwin said with a heavy heart to himself.

A hand touched his shoulder. "Look I don't know how you managed to get away but we better go before one of those military police dogs get the great idea to look over the wall." Levi reminded him.

"Yea." Erwin absentmindedly agreed.

Both men released their gear from the wall and dropped a few meters before hooking to the wall again and using the gas to propel them forward along the great slab of concrete.

What had just happened..? Did Nile plan this all along without him knowing? To die in his place in a obvious public display? Erwin had indeed formulated a plan to get out of the death sentence. He had a lot of time to think while awaiting his trial and even after the sentence he received. Why did Nile act anyway? Was it possible Nile knew something Erwin didn't and believed any plan Erwin made would fail? If that was the case, Erwin understood Nile's reason to not tell Erwin of his plan of action. If Erwin knew, he would not have let Nile go through with it and instead chose to die by himself as it should have been. Erwin glanced at the sword he was holding, replaying flashbacks off all Nile's interactions with him. It made sense now. That's why Nile wanted him to wear his harness so he could transfer the maneuver gear when they fell from the wall. Taking those bullets for Erwin would appeared as if Nile and he were both shot before falling off Wall Rose. The Military Police wouldn't look for him, much less their own commander. Hell, no one probably even knew what the hell was going on. He sure didn't. Then why did Nile lie about Levi? Why pretend?

He remembered then, a long time ago Nile promised one day to make a move Erwin could not predict; his words were so insignificant back then, maybe it was in his head and it was all just coincidence that the things happened the way they did. But Nile confirmed himself at the gallows when he told Erwin it was still his move to make.

A dark chuckle left Erwin's lips as he realized now.

Life wasn't a chess match, he once told Nile, because people didn't behave like pieces. But that man played him just like a chess piece and Erwin had let him because he gave up. In a bold move, Nile removed the human factor that would stop the game from mirroring real life. After years of loss, Nile knew the only way he could win against Erwin was if Erwin stopped playing the game. Nile didn't want him to try anything so in turn he had to make Erwin believe Levi to be dead so Erwin would stop putting up a fight and just stop thinking. That action would leave an open path for Nile himself to slip in unnoticed and pull the stunt he did.

When faced with a losing situation where the king had no chance for survival, Nile sacrificed the rest of his pieces so the king could survive just a little longer. Yet, in this case, in Nile's game; Nile wasn't the king piece. Erwin was. In the end, Nile performed his signature losing move that he always did in chess.

"Should I run or should I stay?" Erwin quoted to himself remembering a long lost memory of Nile holding a rook chess piece.

Levi came up beside him using his maneuver gear's gas to be in flight alongside Erwin.

"What was that?" He questioned.

Erwin shook his head a smile on his lips. "Stay. He always stayed."

He stayed even if it meant a sure death for his remaining wooden chess pieces.

The sun fell behind the horizon bathing the wall and endless forest a beautiful red and orange. Within seconds the sun was gone allowing night to fall, a reminder of another day lived and gone. Erwin anchored one of his rapping hooks into the wall, stopping to watch the last glow of the sun before it too faded away. Levi mirrored his move landing above him and somewhat to the left, but he wasn't watching the horizon. He was watching Erwin.

"You're not going to get all sappy on me, are you?" Levi asked with a deadpan voice.

Erwin turned to the short man with a lopsided smile.

"No, not yet, at least." He promised turning back to the horizon where the sun had long left leaving the surroundings a perpetual twilight.

There would be a time for him to analyze what exactly led up to him being fooled so easily. And there would be a day where he'd realized all the signs he failed to see before. But for now, in order to keep going and keep fighting, he could not succumb to heavy emotions or he would be better off dead like as those who proceeded him. The truth would probably disable him so he had no choice but believe the lie that had made up for himself. Erwin would have to do as he always did when soldiers close to him died in battle. At that moment, he locked anyway all those memories of his best friend so that one day he would understand what actually took place. One day, when the world was not plagued by outside horrors and run by inner monsters, Erwin would call to mind the events of today. One day, he would atone for the sins he had done. And when that day came, he would be ready.

"I'm sorry, Nile."

Erwin unhooked his anchor and fell backwards activating his gas to continue on with Levi close behind him. Erwin couldn't help one thought that was pulling at the edge of his mind.

If the sun was set to rise again, what makes this any different?

* * *

><p>Erwin finally understood what was bothering him when he finished speaking to the therapist across from him. He absentmindedly thanked the man for his time and left the therapist to return home on horseback his mind a jumbled mess just like that day he watched Nile die for him.<p>

All those sleepless nights were caused by those memories he willed himself to be kept away from his mind. They were never gone and with time those memories had broken through all his defenses he had built that day many years ago. Eventually the stockpile of every painful memory was too heavy for him to ignore forever. And with his goal accomplished years ago, he no longer could distract himself from facing what he had done.

One memory stood out to be the one he believed was breaking what was left of him. It was that last image he saw of Nile before he disappeared into the canopy of trees never to be seen again. The bleeding wounds he sustained in defending him coated the green horse adorned across his back. The blood that caught on the air from his back formed what looked like rising wings spreading far out behind him. Nile had always talked of wanting to be free but in his eyes they would be bound to a cage their entire lives, and that no amount of struggling would free them from the world's hold.

The Survey Corps had long stood for the glory of humanity. In this endless fight, they have may forgotten the meaning of that phrase. Killing titans in the name of humanity did not make you a hero, much less human. Any blood-lusting animal could kill another in defense of itself or its home. It came down to what it really meant to be human in the first place. To die in place of another with a goal greater than yourself was the ultimate display of your humanity and love for another human being. 'For the glory of humanity' was in actuality 'for the achievement and beauty of all the human race.'

When he fell in that free fall, not bound by maneuver gear or any earthly limitation, he truly was free in his last moment. Until his last stand of long overdue bravery, to forgo his fear; Nile had kept his promise all those years ago.

He had joined the Survey Corps at last.

When Erwin had returned to his house along the countryside, he had fallen into Levi's arms with tears streaming down his face. The shorter man had immediately panicked and pulled a much taller Erwin inside. Levi never seen Erwin cry in front of him, much less cry at all when faced with death or a lost battle that cost the lives of over half his men. Erwin continued to cry even when he was forced onto the couch. He pulled at the end of his own hair with shaky hands as the feeling of anguish overwhelmed him. All these years he held back such a display of weakness and now the emotions came back full force. He cried for the soldiers under his command, he cried for Mike, he cried for when he thought he lost Levi, but most of all he cried when he had told Nile that he hated him only to have the man save him at the cost of his life. Levi stayed by his side like he had done most of his career rubbing circles into Erwin's back and the taller man's frame shook with a force from deep inside him. Erwin didn't know how long he was in such a state and it didn't matter. The tears eventually slowed to allow his only arm find its way to wrap around Levi in a death grip. Levi allowed such contact and never stopping rubbing Erwin's back as if a constant reminder that he was still here. Erwin didn't move again for some time.

With a weary heart, Erwin had gone outside hours of crying to smoke a cigarette, telling Levi he needed a moment to collect himself. After the events of today Erwin was not surprised to see the distorted soldier from his mind outside with him. Leaned against a wall, the soldier was smoking already looking out into the star filled sky in deep thought. Yet this time, he could make out details in the soldier's appearance that left him wondering why he couldn't tell who the soldier was in the beginning. Erwin came to stand beside the ghastly figure, not frightened in the least.

"So.." The soldier spoke for the first time his voice rough as it had always been in Erwin's memory. The soldier lowered his stick and flicked some ash to the ground. "Are you finally going to let me go, crybaby?" He questioned, his tone drawling out.

Erwin snorted almost having to choke back a sob that threatened to overcome him once more. "I did once." He shot back his eyes hurt before sighing in defeat, his voice low. "I never hated you, even that day when you took everything from me."

Silence followed his declaration just leaving the sound of the night.

"I know." The man responded taking another drag from his cigarette.

Erwin breathed on slowly, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes once more.

"Why did you do it? You had a family. A wife. Children." Erwin asked, sorrow clear in his voice.

The soldier removed the smoke from his lips. "Why did I do it?" He contemplated to himself then laughed, not making a sound. "Why did we fight for humanity? Why did we live, while others died?" He turned to the blonde beside him. "Does it really matter..? I did what I had to do. I wanted freedom, Erwin, maybe that freedom was in you.." He said vaguely as if knowing his own inside joke. "Only a man who has lost everything, can truly appreciate anything." He drew his eyebrows together with a smirk. "Let go of the past, Erwin. It's fogging up your future." The man chided him.

Erwin smiled his lips tugging at his own heartstrings. He put his own cigarette to his lips and withdrew a lighter from his pants pocket. Just before he could flick the flame to life, a gush of wind blew at that moment knocking the stick from his mouth onto the ground. His stunned expression turned to the apparition beside him.

"Those are bad for you." The soldier told him with a grin before extinguishing his own and turning away.

"I know." Erwin told him earnestly, his teeth showing in a smile that finally reached his eyes.

"Of course you do." The soldier remarked, stepping away from the ex-commander. "Goodbye, Erwin."

Erwin pocketed the lighter watching the man walk away into the night. A wind picked up that did not disturb the man's clothing. His uniform never moved with the passing of the wind and the click of his boots only seemed to be heard echoing in Erwin's own head. The wind blew around his figure, stirring leaves at his feet and carrying him far out into the sky much like smoke from his cigarette. Within seconds he was gone, never really have been there in the first place. The night chill wafted around Erwin leaving him standing alone in the crisp night like many times before.

Erwin went back inside to find Levi reading book with glasses perched on top of his nose. Hearing Erwin walk in, he lowered the book and took the rims anyway from his eyes with a flick of his hand. He never questioned why Erwin was smiling or why he stood taller now, no longer slouching in his posture. His eyes were a bright blue like the ocean they saw their last day as officers of the Survey Corps.

Erwin extended his hand and Levi took it within his own not a second later. They went to bed that night in each other's embrace and for the first time in many years Erwin awoke to morning light, the nightmares had not come. This happened the next night as well. And the night after that.

Erwin Smith never did see those hallucinations again.


End file.
